And Now, A Word From The Non-Reality Based Community
'Saving Private Ryan': A New Casualty of the Indecency War (washingtonpost.com): "But back in 2001, the AFA went after ABC over 'Saving Private Ryan,' filing a complaint with the FCC in hopes it would slap the stations with an indecency fine. In its complaint, the AFA noted the movie's 'violence, bloodshed, language and profanity,' according to a letter of response from the FCC, a copy of which was obtained by The TV Column."
Last week's presidential election also played into Citadel's decision to scrap tonight's unedited broadcast of "Saving Private Ryan" and replace it with the TV movie "Return to Mayberry."
We heard a spokesman for the American Family Association interviewed on the radio last evening. He bragged about the AFA's protest process. Thousand of group members are poised to sign into the AFA web site, sign the group's canned letters of protest to the FCC. The AFA will then forward these letters to the FCC. The spokesman did not state whether AFA members would actually watch Saving Private Ryan before signing the letters.
The AFA's complaint with the movie Saving Private Ryan appears to be with its liberal use of the word "fuck." The ABC spokesman interviewed in the story said the word "fuck" appears 40 times in the movie. The AFA guy also complained about the taking of the Lord's name in vain.
Pudentilla has not herself seen the movie (it was cancelled in Maine as well). She chose not to see it in the theaters or on TV because, well, she's a wimp and can't take very violent movies. All the reviews said that while the movie was excellent and according to WWII vets the most accurate portrayal of actual combat in Hollywood history, it was (perhaps because of its accuracy) a very violent movie. So informed, Pudentilla chose not to see the movie. It's a pity the members of the AFA have such poorly formed personalities that they cannot exercise a similar degree of self-control.
Pudentilla has heard no one assert that the violence in Saving Private Ryan is gratuitous. It seems odd to her, then, that the AFA spokesman on the radio last night complained about the coarse language in the movie. As Pudentilla understands it, the actors in the movie say "fuck," "god damn it" and "son of a bitch" quite frequently as they portray the soldiers who stormed the beaches of Normandy on DDay. As Pudentilla understands the historical record, this representation of the language used by G.I.s as they attempted landings in horrible seas while German gunners shot at them seems to be historically accurate.
Moreover, according to Pudentilla's cousin Father Martin, who was a missionary priest for most of his adult life, God would not take offense at this use of language by the G.I.'s. Pudentilla comes to this conclusion based on a conversation she had with Father Martin when she was 10 years old. He came to visit on one of his breaks from the mission. The man truly was godly (unlike his brother Monsignor James - but that's another story) and had, as far as Pudentilla could tell, only one vice - golf. All he ever wanted to do when he came to the States was golf. So when he visited, Pudentilla's father threw the family in the car, drove to a lovely golf course and treated everyone to a day on the links. This particular visit, Father Martin decided that Pudentilla was old enough to learn how to play.
God did not endow Pudentilla with the family's golf gene. After a few holes of frustration, Pudentilla realized that Father Martin had been following her as she hacked her way 20 yards at a time up the fairway.
"Pudentilla, you know what you need to do, here, don't you?" he asked. Pudentilla looked at him in confusion and confessed that was precisely what she didn't know.
"You need to say 'damn it'. In fact, what you really need to do is say 'God damn it,' several times very loudly." Pudentilla explained to Father Martin that her parents forebade her to swear and that she didn't think God would like it if a priest encouraged a little girl to swear.
"Ah Pudentilla," Father Martin laughed, "God hates a liar far more than he hates a few cuss words. And the way your golfing, darling, not to swear at all is to tell a very big lie."
Which is why, comparing very small things to very great, Pudentilla concludes that the AFA is utterly wrong and that God didn't mind at all when the soldiers who stormed the beaches at Normandy and who held their lives so cheaply in order to be sure that Hitler would be defeated said, "God damn it," "fuck" and "son of a bitch."
What God thinks of the AFA is another matter. It is not for us to make such judgements. However, we do not think, based on what we have heard and read about the movie and the response of vets to it, that the bravery of those vets was as well commemorated by a showing of Return to Mayberry as it would have been by a showing of Saving Private Ryan. God damn it. Fuck. Sons of bitches.